Conservative Leaders Criticize Obama


Conservative Leaders Criticize Obama ‘Attack’ on Religion



In a rare display of religious unity, both Mullahs of the ruling Iranian Party and the Taliban of Afghanistan, joined with the Republican Party of the United States in the unanimously denouncing President Obama's January 20th announcement requiring sectarian schools and hospitals to provide birth-control coverage to employees. Republican leaders, seeking to rally conservatives at an annual gathering, accused President Barack Obama of assaulting religious liberty by requiring sectarian schools and hospitals to provide birth-control coverage to employees.

The Mullahs scoffed at the Obama policy, saying they handled the birth control issue quickly and fairly, pointing out the execution of Atefah Ali, a 16 year old Iranian Girl for “Crimes against Chastity.” “We don't need no stinking contraceptives,” sneered one young Mullah. We have an endless supply of stones which we throw accurately and with great fervor to support our laws about Chastity.



Spurred by the religious fervor and unexpected support, the Senate Minority Leader Republican Mitch McConnell said, “The Obama administration has crossed a dangerous line,” addressing hundreds of Republican activists who attended the Conservative Political Action Conference in Washington.  “We will fight this attack on the fundamental right to religious freedom until the courts overturn it,” said McConnell, Senator from Kentucky.

According to the Associated Press, “The administration’s decision, announced Jan. 20, has quickly entered the presidential campaign. Catholic bishops ordered lectures from pulpits across the country. Republicans view the ruling as a potential liability for Obama, particularly in swing states including Michigan and Pennsylvania with large populations of Catholic voters.”

The Taliban said the ruling would not affect areas of Afghanistan they now control, or will overrun in the near future, but were meeting only to show their unanimous support for God taking control of any government. The Iranian Mullahs were as united in their support of the American conservatives as well, demanding Mattel quit making an insidious instrument to defeat God's laws, the Barbie Doll. In support of their January 12th ban on the sale of Barbie Dolls, the 'Trojan horse' that the Mullahs claim sneaks in western influences like makeup and revealing clothes and helps undermine God's laws, the Mullahs showed a flickering black and white silent movie showing what appeared to be a young girl holding a Barbie doll instead of a Koran!

House Speaker John Boehner, an Ohio Republican, has promised that his chamber will pass legislation to overturn Obama's rule.

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